Getting divorced is never an easy decision, especially if you have children with your spouse. Explaining the situation to them might feel scary.
In a fragile situation like the one you face, knowing how to talk to your children could give you some direction. Using the right strategies may increase your confidence so you can effectively communicate your thoughts.
Consider age and maturity
Depending on the ages and maturity of your children, you might need to use different tactics to describe the situation. Regardless of such factors, you should refrain from ever divulging too many sensitive details or persuading your children to take your side.
Encourage your children to ask questions. Think carefully about your answers. Take into account their ages and maturity so you can appropriately disseminate information without causing confusion.
Emphasize safety and love
Reactions of surprise, grief and even anger might come from your children. This is normal. Allow your children to feel emotional. Encourage them to acknowledge their emotions. Reassure them that despite the changes to your family dynamic, your love and commitment to them remains unchanged. Healthychildren.org says to emphasize safety. Remind them that you will protect them and continue to support them no matter what. Even as your divorce progresses, try to maintain a consistent schedule to help your children feel safe and comforted.
Waiting until an appropriate time to disclose the situation and carefully articulating your thoughts may improve your delivery. Collaborating with your soon-to-be-ex, if possible, may help your children better understand the situation. Divorce is a challenging time for everyone, but you have the opportunity to replace uncertainty with reassurance and confusion with clarity.
